i'm fat

I am now on vacation in a city in the Visayas.

I studied two years here. Got married here. Worked a while here.

Last time I was here was 2 years ago, to attend the burial of a relative.

Now, people I know gape at me and do not think twice (probably my figure now shocks them too much they temporarily lose the ability to think...and to be a tad bit considerate) to say or maybe exclaim:
A. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?!?
B. DID YOU JUST GIVE BIRTH???
C. ARE YOU UNDER MEDICATION???
D. YOU'RE FAT!!!! ( person who said this is miraculously unkilled and
unhurt by me)

I always tell myself that I won't care what people say about my weight. As long as I'm content, happy and especially more intellectual than the morons who focus on my physical appearance (bitter me?), fuck them all.

But, as I looked at the my reflection and the uploaded pictures of our outings, I though to myself:
A. WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?!?
B. DID I JUST GIVE BIRTH (i'm sure this can't be true. To be pregnant one would have to have sex. I haven't been having any action. I think my partner would be afraid my body would swallow him up if he as much as cuddles me)
C. WHAT MEDICATION HAVE I BEEN TAKING??? (not medication. excessive intake of alcohol)
D. FUUUUUAAAAAACK! I'M FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!

I swear...by my father's name and whatever is appropriate to swear on...I will be fucking thinner! In 3 months, I will be thinner. Prettier. OOzing with fucking sex appeal.

I CANNOT WAIT until the 7th! I'm going on leave and I don't even friggin care if they take 5 days off my salary.

I need to get out of here! I need to stay away from M-factors. The insistent ooh-ah-ooh-ooh-aah responses continuously ringing in my ears is too much to bear! This is the sound me boss makes to mask her trailing thoughts and to portray the idea that she's actually considering your thoughts/suggestions/objections/rebuttals: "Oo..aaaaah...Oo...uh-hmmm..aaaaaah...Oo-Oo...aaaaaah". Where actually what she meant was: "Shit, when is this going to end...I need to cough up this phlegm in my throat...I'm so thirsty I need to make some iced tea and irritate these sons of bitches more with the tinkle-tinkle sound of the teaspoon in my glass."

I'm tired of having to hawk around a colleague waiting for the next wrong move so I can justify him/her getting fired (retrenched if you must) sparing us of his pungent smell and spiderweb-infested ears.

I'm tired of writing on glass boards thinking up ways of shutting up incessant nagging of someone not knowing what people should be doing.

I'm tired of trying to get to work at 8:00 am but actually getting to work at nine then trying to get off work at 6:30 but actually loggin-out at 8:30.

I'm tired of 1.5 inch heels, blazers and running make-up at 1:00 pm.

I'm tired of making reports on everything which could have been discussed--really!

I'm tired of gullible superiors easily praising reports of which the main ingredient is BULLSHIT.

I'm tired of all these things.

After 7 days... I just might...be missing these shit.